Manhood, Manliness & MentoringAbout Ian Forest-Jones

Hey there! My name is Ian Forest-Jones and I’m really glad to have you visit my site.

The Reality: Becoming a good man doesn’t happen by accident; it requires intentional guidance. Men need active mentors to teach them how to forge courage, strength, mastery, and honourinto prosocial citizenship and virtuous living.

The Challenge: Australian churches currently face a 60-40 gender gap favouring women, leaving a generation of boys and men without an accessible and inclusive source of vital, community-based mentorship.¹

The Mission: My aim is to encourage and equip males to navigate the modern world and bridge the gap between being good at being men to becoming good men AND help Australian churches build environments where men can genuinely thrive.

The Promise: Strong men build strong communities. Empowering men in the Church is never a zero-sum game; when men step up with honour and purpose, the women, children, and community flourish.

What Makes a Good Man?

I am quite conscious of the fact there are competing opinions on what constitutes a “good man”.

According to Glenn Stanton, “Manhood is not natural, but it is essential … manhood is in crisis today … Men are falling behind women in important measures of personal and social well-being”. He argues quite convincingly that boys are males by nature but only transition into manhood “with significant, intentional work by other men”. In other words, it takes a community of men to raise a man.

Manhood is not natural, but it is essential … manhood is in crisis today.

Glenn Stanton

In experience, research and reflection on the topic, I have come to understand a good man is formed through intentional guidance from other men, developing courage, strength, mastery, and honour expressed in prosocial citizenship and virtuous living. Moving from boyhood to manhood requires significant, intentional work by other men within a community.

It Takes a Community

Unfortunately, community is also in crisis in contemporary Western societies. Healthy, functional, safe communities are hard to find because, while everyone agrees we need such, very few are willing to put in the effort to create and maintain them.

One type of community still readily available throughout the Western world is local Christian churches. By accepting males as men —in other words, helping them to become good at being men— I am convinced local churches can earn the right to encourage and equip them to become good men.

To this end, I want to serve men and their families by creating safe spaces for men to talk through issues related to manhood and manliness, life, meaning, and faith; to encourage and equip men for a life of discipleship (i.e., placing their faith in Jesus and living a Christian lifestyle); and, to facilitate healthy, functional and safe communities of faithfor men and their families.

I want to serve men and their families by creating safe spaces for men.

I believe Christian churches need intentional men’s mentorship, through both formal programs and informal processes, because boys and men need active guidance and a healthy community in which to grow. Local Christian churches remain a readily available community where men and their families can be encouraged, equipped, and supported in faith.

Men and Faith

I know many will disagree, but I have come to believe local churches favour women —for very good and legitimate reasons, of course, yet this is evidence of the plight of men already noted. While this is a contentious issue, a compelling case can be made to support it. If true, this is especially unfortunate since it can be shown that when local churches reach men, they serve women too and build families, thereby leading to a better society.

I wonder then how can I, as an individual Christian and a community leader, encourage and equip those good at being men to become good men, when some are “Nones” and some are “Dones”? In other words, how can I encourage faith in Jesus among males having little to no prior spiritual or religious convictions, on the one hand, and equip those no longer connected nor committed to a local church on the other? How can I partner with both types of men, partnering with them as intrapreneurs so as to impact their neighbourhoods positively?

Growing up, I was a None who became a Christian because God our Creator gave me hope. Yet I have found myself too to be at risk for becoming a done because of my journey with the Church. Nevertheless, I have refined my calling and remain convinced of my faith in Jesus and my commitment to a Christian lifestyle because God is my Father; Jesus is my brother, who accepts me as a friend; and, the Holy Spirit is my mentor.

God is my Father; Jesus is my brother, who accepts me as a friend; and, the Holy Spirit is my mentor.

The following video will give you a good sense of how I came to place my faith in Jesus and committed to a Christian lifestyle, since I was not born nor raised in a Christian family:

As you can see, my upbringing was not something I would wish anyone to endure. Consequently, I am not your typical Christian nor community leader. I do not spend my days in an ivory tower, which is surprising, I know, given I have been in ministry for 30+ years. My faith is real and honest and I too struggle to live a Christian lifestyle in a world gone mad and churches that appear irrelevant or are rendered immobile by internal, petty dissension.

In summary, I have been in ministry for 30+ years. I have three university degrees (M.Th, M.A. B.A). I have completed far too many seminars and workshops to mention. The most relevant to my current pursuits are that I completed certification in Transformative Pastoral Practice in October 2019 and Executive certification as a Human Behaviour Consultant in 2006. I was ordainedby the Fellowship of Congregational Churches in July 2023. I now write about men, faith, and community from my own personal Christian journey. My faith is real and honest, shaped by an upbringing I would not wish on anyone and by the ongoing challenge of living a Christian lifestyle amid church dissension and social uncertainty.

So, have a wander around my posts and pages, sermons, articles and ebooks. Please leave a question or a comment below or even contact me directly. You can also find me on social media channels too!

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Endnotes

1. NCLS Research, “The Gender Profile of Australian Churchgoers”, Sep-2022, https://replug.link/271e58aa. [↩]